I wrote a story about a great local lutefisk supper in a mostly serious way, but I also wrote some extremely silly fake headlines for it that we obviously didn’t use.*
Here’s the real headline:
Lots of lutefisk: Church readies 375 pounds of Scandinavian delicacy
Here are the fakes, with at least one addition from others in the newsroom:
Lutefisk: Probably a crime against humanity
Lutefisk: Run while you still can.
Lutefisk: Banned by the Geneva Convention.
Lutefisk: Wait, you want me to eat what?
Lutefisk: Because trials of fish soaked in arsenic didn’t go so well.
Lutefisk: Scandinavians’ attempt to see what they can get other people to eat
Lutefisk: Making haggis sound yummy
Lutefisk: Try it, you won’t die (probably)
375 pounds of lutefisk: Scandinavian WMDs
Lutefisk: A true tale of Scandinavian passive-aggression
Lutefisk: No, seriously, people eat it
Lutefisk: 1 out of 10 people prefer it to tree bark
Have any suggestions for more? Hit the comments!
I think everyone should get the chance to at least smell lutefisk, and, if they have the fortitude, try a taste. Lutefisk is meant to be served hot, and generally with melted butter. My family likes to mash it in with potatoes and stuff it into a piece of lefse to make a sort of potato-fish burrito.
Do not use silver plated silverware with lutefisk.
Do not overcook lutefisk.
Do not taunt lutefisk.
* I am half Norwegian, and my grandfather makes lutefisk for Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. So yes, I do respect lutefisk, but after extensive exposure, I feel entitled to make fun of it a bit. I have never eaten it, but believe it is a fine old tradition best practiced by people who are not me. My brother has eaten lutefisk and I am happy to say he has suffered no ill effects. Some day his tastebuds may grow back.